sanjay blogs

On May 24th, 2019 I delivered my first ever Slam-Poetry. I was/am not a good poet . It was just things in my mind I wanted to deliver and with much effort I calmed myself to go and break the comfort zone of mine. Cloudfactory had managed a "Slam Poetry and Stand Up Comedy Night" and I thought it was a perfect place to start.

Although this poem carries a dark theme, it tries to make a point, although a vague one. Not a great writer, so thoughts are disorganized and not coherent.

Since I write to pass my thoughts, most of the time they are un-welcomed(I don't even know if that word exists). It's just I find it peaceful and with myself. So, even though it may hurt someone or people dislike I will continue writing, at least to myself.

Have a great day !

EDITED(Credits to Pratik Bhurtel for this subtle reshuffle of words):
May 24th, 2019, was a big day for me. God! i had just written a Slam-Poetry. The rhythm of my poem hit me like a mozart's music, just words made up from my mind could do this wonder to my confidence, this, right here, I couldn't decipher. This poem carries a dark theme to some, to some it's a ray of hope. I ain't a great writer but the words in it made me feel so. What if I could also become one great writer? This poetry rose the, 'What if' question of positive vibe that I had been long searching for. It fulfilled my great desire of hope. I find this poetry peaceful, and I don't care if it hurts ya all, I am always doing things my way. Have a great day, folks!

Hypocrisy

When I was born, the sky wasn’t blue but black
The clouds weren’t fluffy and bright, but radiantly dark
Swift breeze blowing weren’t gentle but harsh
It was a gloomy day as you can imagine, and date : 13th of March
When I opened my eyes, I sensed things, dark and mute, like a loo
I still remember that house and those sound, nothing was new and was like a deja vu
I saw faces and those voice which I already knew
Claimed me as a god gift & some sweet name, you just name a few..
Grew up in tidy place, chained by our customs
Being a sheep, disheartened face, life was so much fun
I hated people, their pretty smiles and their mere presence
Their words were too cold that it burned me to flames.
I didn’t talked much but I had my voice
Be like someone because you got no choice
I was too fragile and they moulded me nice.
And now i was dumb and deaf, with no much surprise.

And I slept one day and the tension arise,
I’ve never seen me, myself with a disguise
I had this mask, that stuck in my face
It was the one people labelled religion and race
I felt my heart racing like it was never before, my throat went dry and heart burnt with roar
He pierces to my eyes and whispers me loud
“I’m tired, I’m too tired”.
I had this scary feeling that took me by soul

“Modernity has failed us mate”.
I’m tired and I’m tired to think that my life is my fate.
I wish “i-hate-this-world” has a true meaning face
The world is a big hoax and full of fakeness
People here are ill and take does of narcissism
Brainwashed by fake life of their own and some celebrity stardom.
I eyes are so dark that a brightness enters seldom
I’m here for a short time and you should absolutely listen.

I live a hypocrite life and I hate my face and this stupid tongue
Just tell me mate, is wrong to not believe in right and wrong?
Should I behave like a stray dog with his tail down?
Feeling humiliated, with no answers, my eyes stuck on the wet ground
Authenticity is labelled fraud, and why do you ask?
Modernity has failed us and we have a lot of work and task
I see people and their actions and their fakeness too much
It made me too soft that my heart turned to rock.
They sit in the house of glass and worship a sleek stone
Works like Satan and worship god with such an innocent tone?

I thought that must be it, God’s got the answer
And I set the pedal to find the key, either him or her
But it’s nowhere to be seen, it’s just another hoax
Rich people created it, to flourish the sheeps and chase away the fox
When all the ideas failed, they frightened me me with the Afterlife.
Now I left my house, idolize them and worship them till 5
I tried, I tried, I tried and now I’m tired.
I'm too deep into it now, there's no more place to dive
~~God is dead,Nietzsche said, and so I’ve believed it now.~~

I woke up and felt a pang in my heart
Never before a thought had pierced a hole and left it hollow
I made up my mind then, I’ll be my own leader, there’s no one to follow
And the sky turned orange, and the sun popped out happy
It was a new morning I promised, even the air had a different essence
I would spread peace, love and unity, like the world has never seen
I lookup to the mirror and wonder how to start and what do I say?
Yesterday I was born and today is my first day.

The love for Windows XP is never over. It was an iconic Windows version and many people loved it. 7% of Windows Users still use Windows XP aware of the security flaws. XP was loved and praised so much. Microsoft releases a newer version of Windows with security patches and further improvements. However, it is estimated that more than 1 billion copies of Windows XP was sold as off last year and XP still continues it's legacy. The XP was launched back in 2001.

The Microsoft has moved into Metro style with the introduction of Windows 8 and so on but some users are not satisfied with it. Many companies still use Windows XP as it is convenient and user-friendly From the iconic wallpaper to Minesweeper and from Internet Explorer to cute dog while searching, Windows has gone a huge transformation, However, it doesnot seem the people are liking it, as they are still attached to the greatest OS of all time - Windows XP(entirely personal opinion).

Microsoft has already stopped supporting XP as to promote their newer version of Windows. The approach taken by Microsoft could be well appreciated but Windows XP still carries its legacy. The main reason behind Windows XP success was that Microsoft combined both the business and home version and released as one Operating System. The XP was stable, good-looking, user-friendly, packed tons of good and reliable feature and had Rover.

However, we're not talking about Windows XP today(a lot of XP intro though). This is the story about the iconic wallpaper that XP users remembered for ages. The BLISS as shown in the image below is considered as one of the most iconic photographs of all time.

Charles "Chuck" O'Rear, photographer of this famous wallpaper was driving from Sonoma County through Napa on his way to Marin County in 1998. Daphne, the women he was to meet was waiting for him. She eventually became his wife later. As in January, the rain arrives and turns barren land into beautiful green lust land before the summer heat burns them brown again.

As he drove down Highway 121 he noticed the beautiful scene that surrounded. As he mentions "“the grasses turn green and I know the chances of finding these beautiful hillsides are really good,” he recalled. “I’m going to be more prepared. I’m going to be more alert.”

And then, he saw it. “My God!” he thought. “The grass is perfect! It’s green! The sun is out, there’s some clouds.’”

He clicked some shots with color Fujifilm and they were uploaded to Corbis, a stock photo and image licensing site founded by Bill Gates. The photo of the brillant green grass, with clear blue sky with some patches of cloud was unedited. A few years later, he got a call from Microsoft asking to use his shot as the default background for the ever-know Microsoft Windows XP.

However, the site of those beautiful grape vines were partly destroyed by the fire. The iconic place is now not so prominently beautiful as it was but still it hasn't left people dazzled. The place now seems ass below.

I woke up today in lazy fashion and then slept again. It has been kind of daily routine lately. Getting up to sleep again. The morning light already crept in my room and was whispering me silently to get up and move along. So, I got up, washed my face, did some stretching and sat to practice some maths. As my next exam is Mathematics, which I'm terrible at, I tried to focus and solve some problems. After 25 minutes of sheer willpower and laser focus, I solved 2-3 problems and was pretty satisfied. I went to another room and got my laptop to check FIMDBIMD. Oh, You don't know what that means? Well, it stands for Football Is My Drug, Barcelona is my dealer(A Facebook Fan Page for FC Barcelona) . I was just scrolling lazily until I found a post. It was Avicii. It was him.

I couldn't believe my eyes. I immediately opened a new tab and then searched AVICII and I was already surprised to see the Google's Search recommending terms like "Avicii dead", "Avicii death news". I was confused and shocked at the same time and the mixture of such emotions drove me crazy. I loved AVICII. He was one of my favorite artists and I remembered enjoying his songs for so long time. I remember humming his songs in my college days and when I talked to my friend - Rohan about Avicii and his song. It was just nostalgic. His songs reminded of my past and my dreams at the same time. "Wake me Up" was my wake up call several times and "Nights" was my all time favourite inspirational song. What he gave and created was something only few could've imagined. I still remember when he made the statement

“WE ALL REACH A POINT IN OUR LIVES AND CAREERS WHERE WE UNDERSTAND WHAT MATTERS THE MOST TO US.

For me it’s creating music. That is what I live for, what I feel I was born to do.

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Last year I quit performing live, and many of you thought that was it. But the end of live never meant the end of Avicii or my music. Instead, I went back to the place where it all made sense – the studio.

The next stage will be all about my love of making music to you guys. It is the beginning of something new.

Hope you’ll enjoy it as much as I do.”

One of the prominent reason why I'll miss Avicii is the inclusion of his song "Nights" in FIFA 15. I remember playing FIFA 15 with my brother back home and "Nights" was one of my favorite FIFA Tracks of all time with "Hit It" by American Authors. The reason I fell in love with Avicii was this track an "Wake Me Up". How I wonder he is no more with us now. I feel a deep grief and it saddens a deep part of my heart knowing that I will not see any Video Upload notification on Youtube and I will not see his "Instagram Stories" anymore. But don't get me wrong, it's not his Instagram stories and Youtube notifications that make me miss him. It is his music and love for music. He has been such an inspiration to people like me(meaning people who listen and admire EDM Music). He along with Martin Garrix was my favorite DJ and I wondered if I could anyway make music like them. But it is part of a story and an unforgivable part of nature. So, there's nothing I can do. I cannot change the world and it remains the way it was. However, AVICII was one of the inspiring figures that taught me that age was nothing if you have interest and determination. I miss you AVICII because your song was such a sweet memory to me and I'll always be happy that I was able to enjoy you. Thank you for everything.

Voice against Hindu are increasing in India as retired government Official and four policemen have been charged over a gang rape and murder of an eight year-old Muslim girl in Kashmir.

Sanji Ram, who was in charge of the temple nearby ordered his nephew and a policeman to kidnap the girl, Asifa. The act of kidnap was done to terrorize members of her nomadic Bakerwalk community in leaving the Kathuwa district. The Hindu wanted the nomadic Muslim community to leave the place as soon as possible and to terrorize the group, the plan was made to kidnap the innocent child and then as the story unfolds, they ended up killing her brutally.

The child, who was just 8-years old was heavily sedated, kept in a Hindu temple, brutally raped several times by at least three men over the course of four days and then was later strangled in her neck, and finally killed by smashing her head with a stone.

The cruel event took the media by storm and people stepped on streets to protest against the criminals and demand justice for the affected. Images of horror has swept across the country and civilians are furious about the case. Eight Hindu men were arrested as they were accused of being involved in the rape and murder of Asifa. The rage spread hugely and the story made headlines when Hindu right-wing groups protested over the arrest of those accused personnel. The case has now become a religious flashpoint and has already taken a serious political issue in the polarised Indian region.

Since the arrested include a retired government official, four police officers and a minor, the Hindus are protesting against their arrest. These accused belong to a local Hindu community that has been involved in a land dispute with the Muslim Nomads.

Here are thoughts by people in the Asifa Rape Case:

Imagine what goes through the mind of an 8 yr old as she is drugged, held captive, gang raped over days and then murdered.

If you don’t feel her terror, you are not human.

If you don’t demand Asifa get justice, you belong to nothing.

— Farhan Akhtar (@FarOutAkhtar) April 12, 2018

How can anyone protect the culprits of such evil?

What happened to Asifa at #Kathua is a crime against humanity. It cannot go unpunished.

What have we become if we allow politics to interfere with such unimaginable brutality perpetrated on an innocent child?

— Rahul Gandhi (@RahulGandhi) April 12, 2018

.@PMOIndia was mute when beef lynchings happened, mute when Dalits were flogged, mute when Vemula committed suicide, mute when Nirav Modi fled, mute when Mallaya fled why will he break his silence for #unnao #kathua. How not to be a leader

— Swati Chaturvedi (@bainjal) April 12, 2018

We need to learn from Pakistan . #Kathua #Asifa #JusticeForAsifa pic.twitter.com/ud50PVeIdp

— Md Asif Khan (@imMAK02) April 12, 2018

Is this really the kind of country we we want to be known as to the world today ?? If we can’t stand up now for this 8 year old girl regardless of our gender,caste,colour or religion then we don’t stand for anything in this world.. not even humanity.. makes me sick to the stomach pic.twitter.com/BDcNuJvsoO

— Sania Mirza (@MirzaSania) April 12, 2018

Some of the people have even connected the case to Nirbhaya's rape case and voiced against all those culprits by stating the people of this country have learned nothing from the past. Crimes like rape cannot be completely stopped, but raising voice for supporting the rapist is completely unacceptable.

This simply states the condition of the country and the way it is headed to. People should be conscious of the situation arising and the chaos they are creating.

Now what surprises most of the people is that claims are being made by Hindu officials stating that the accused are innocent. In the action to terrorize and win the battle of "lands", people have forgotten the limits of Humanity and crossed them brutally, killing beliefs and unity among people. Due to these kinds of activities, India is still known as a country of the rapist and the scene has not changed since. Women are still unsecured and they are treated as a different part of the society.

What is the cause of the rape?

Asifa belongs to a Nomad family who travels across the Himalayas with their livestock in sustaining their life. They often travel from the valley to Jammu, where they use the forest for grazing their livestock. This small act has brought conflict among the residentials Hindus and nomadic Muslims. As per the investigators, the accused wanted the Nomadic Muslims to sweep out of their place and out of Jammu. After they were arrested, lawyers in Jammu city tried to stop police entering the court to file a charge sheet.

The lawyers were believed to be supporting a Hindu right-wing group that has alleged that the accused men are innocent, and have demanded that the case be transferred to India's federal police.

Every week in and out we see some frightening images of war on Syria. From a little boy full of blood to a father running with a child in his hand, the scene of war in Syria has been common, especially in Social Media like Facebook and Twitter. It has nearly been 7 years since the war started and the condition is getting worse. There seems no stopping as International Forces are using Syria as their battleground to fight against themselves. Although the war seems internal, the International Interference has taken Syrian Civil War to a whole devastating level. It is a shameful failure of political advancements. The relentless suffering of Syrian civilian population has now reached a depressing seventh anniversary, as the UN High Commissioner for Refugees Filippo Grandi said on March 9, 2018.

A voice against peace against the president of Syria seven years ago has now turned into the mass graveyard and a full-scale civil war. Not only the war has killed more than 350,000 people dead, rendered 6.1 million people homeless inside Syria and forced 5.6 million refugees to search and live their lives in the extreme in the neighboring countries. The war has drawn International forces, which is keeping the war more extreme and active.

How did the Syrian War start?

The civilians were under constant problems as unemployment, corruption and lack of political freedom was gaining under the regime of President Bashar Al-Assad, who succeeded his late father Hafez in 2000. The people were against this regime and wanted political freedom. In March 2011, in the southern city of Derra, pro-democracy demonstrations erupted inspired by the "Arab Spring" in the neighboring countries.

When the President used his powers to silent the uproaring voices of unsatisfied civilians, the protest demanding president's resignation erupted nationwide.

To simply tell the truth, the people were angry and furious with the force and were fighting for the resignation of the President, who in turn deployed forces to silence things up. The unrest spread and the crackdown intensified. The opposition went onto taking arms, for defending themselves and then to use against the forces deployed by the President Mr. Assad who vowed to crush what he called "foreign-backed terrorism", which by then was already a starting of mass Civil War.

How many people have been killed ?

The Syrian Observatory for Human Rights, a UK-based monitoring group has documented the deaths of 353,900 people by March 2018, including 106,000 civilians. Since, the deaths in such areas are extremely difficult to monitoring, considering the situation when the fights are still on, numbers of death are expected to be around 400,000.

What is the condition of people over the war-affected areas?

Over 90% of people spend their annual income on food and the conditions are getting even worse. Over 69% of people are living in extreme poverty and in war-affected areas prone to diseases and infections. The food price has dramatically increased, average eight times higher than the pre-crisis level. About 5.6 million people endure life-threatening conditions regarding their basic Human right, security and living standards.

UNHCR, the UN Refugee Agency, along with humanitarian partners are making every effort possible to bring relief to people in dire need inside Syria, but access to populations in besieged and areas that are hard to reach remains woefully inadequate. The humanitarian convoy aiding the besieged people of Duma in Eastern Ghouta on 5 March 2018 was a welcome development. Nevertheless, ongoing shelling forced the trucks to leave before half of the food destined for the hungry could be offloaded.[th]

UNHCR and other humanitarian actors remain prepared and anxious to aid hundreds of thousands of people who are trapped in desperate need in Eastern Ghouta as well as other besieged parts of the country. As Grandi said:

“Even in war, there are rules that all sides must respect. In Syria, even the option to flee conflict areas for safety in other parts of the country is diminishing. Humanitarian access to those in need must be guaranteed. People must be allowed to leave to seek refuge, and civilians and civilian infrastructure including hospitals and schools must be protected at all costs.”[th]

“While the focus is on the devastation inside Syria, we should not forget the impact on the host communities in the neighboring countries and the effect that so many years of exile has had on refugees,” Grandi added. “As long as there is no political solution to the conflict, the international community must step up its investment in the host countries.”

The affected civilians, in search of Hope, are fleeing to nearby countries like Turkey, Lebanon, Jordan, Egypt, and Iraq. They dream of returning to their own homeland once the raging war stops and things are safe way back home.

Moreover, the conditions of children in those places is a matter of extreme delicacy. The children in the refugee camps of Lebanon and Jordan can't meet their basic food, shelter or educational needs. Whooping 43% of children are out of the school and the percentage of refugee student in the school has raised in recent years.

What are the International Forces involved?

Countries like Russia and America with their own agendas and view about the war are involved, making the situation far more complex and prolonging the fighting. Also, the local activist group have been involved diving the countries in terms of religion which has sparkled more controversies and dimmed the hopes of peace.

The middle-east has been in condition of serious conflict over longer period of time now. International forces like Russia and United States of Nation are seen constantly interfering the Civil War. American entered the war and spelled against the Syrian President once claimed were made of Chemical Weapon used by the Syrian President.

What makes the war more complicated and prolonged is the involvement of International forces. Russia and Iran are supporting the government whereas US, Turkey, and Saudi Arabia back the rebels. Russia - which already had their military base in Syria, launched an air campaign in support of Mr. Assad in 2015 which turned the war towards the side of government. Iran, on the other hand, is believed to have deployed hundreds of troops and spent billions of dollars to help Mr. President. Thousands of Shia Muslim militiamen armed, trained and financed by Iran - mostly from Lebanon's Hezbollah movement, but also Iraq, Afghanistan, and Yemen - have also fought alongside the Syrian army.

Over the years, donor support has been generous. However, much more is needed. In December 2017, United Nations agencies and some 270 NGO partners released the 2018 Regional Refugee and Resilience Plan (3RP), a US$4.4 billion plan that is designed to support refugees and members of the communities hosting them. However, the gap between the needs and available resources is still wide. In 2017, the international response received only half of the required funding.[th]

A Look at Destruction:

Olympia Restaurant: Before and After

Sources: BBC,CNN,Thinking Humanity, Vox

Kevin Carter took one of the historic pictures in history. The picture was clicked in 1993 and he was awarded Pulitzer Prize for Feature Photography in 1994. The image took the media by storm and still remains one of the most influential photos ever taken.

The photograph is of a famine-stricken boy, who was initially believed to be a girl, starving to death with a vulture watching nearby. The picture tells a very sad story, and anyone who reads the story is sure to get his eyes wet. The tragedy portrayed by this photo goes beyond the picture itself.

During 1993, the parts of Sudan such as Kongor, Ayud, and Waat were much affected by famine.The Hunger Triangle, a name relief organizations used in the 1990s for the area defined by the South Sudan communities Kongor, Ayod, and Waat, was dependent on UNESCO and other aid organizations to fight famine. Forty percent of the area's children under 5 years old were malnourished as of January 1993, and an estimated 10 to 13 adults died of starvation daily in Ayod alone.-[wiki]. As the condition was severe, attempts were made to make this situation over the world know about it. Photojournalists and other people were invited by Operation Lifetime Sudan to light the extreme famine problem.

In March 1993, Joao Silva and Kevin Carter were offered to visit Sudan and report about famine and such similar problems hovering around those places. The offer was made by Robert Hadley, a former photographer and information officer for the UN Operation Lifeline Sudan at that time, in March 1993. Carter and Silva decided to go because Silva thought it would make him some kind of war photographer and for Carter, it was a way to escape "the trapped feeling". Arrangements were made for the trip and two enthusiastic photographers with their own imaginations on the mind ,set to flew away towards the poverty struck part of Sudan.

Since the problem of famine was high, there was constant fighting and blood. The new fighting in Sudan forced them to wait in Nairobi for the period of time. The next day the airplane landed in the tin hamlet of Ayod. The villagers were already waiting for food in the runaway, as Marinvoich wrote.

Both Silva and Carter separated to take pictures of people, the mother, the children and the adults, dead or alive or of those one fighting their last battles, all victims of catastrophic famine that has arisen through the war. Carter was shocked at the situation and he informed Silva that witnessing the famine affected him emotionally. Silva, on the other side, was searching for rebel soldiers so that he could have some authority and when he found some such soldiers, Carter joined him too. Since the soldier did not speak English, it was rather difficult to communicate. One was constantly looking for Carter's watch, so Carter gave him as a gift and the soldiers became their bodyguards and followed them to their protection.

While Carter was moving towards the runaway to click more images of starvation, on his was he stopped several places to frame more of images. He came across a child lying on his face in the hot sun - he took the picture.

Carter joined Silva in the runaway and told ""You won't believe what I've just shot! … I was shooting this kid on her knees, and then changed my angle, and suddenly there was this vulture right behind her! … And I just kept shooting – shot lots of films![12] Silva asked him where he shot the picture and was looking around to take a photo as well. Carter pointed to a place 50 m (160 ft) away. Then Carter told him that he had chased the vulture away. He told Silva he was shocked by the situation he had just photographed, saying, "I see all this, and all I can think of is Megan", his young daughter. A few minutes later they left Ayod for Kongor.[13]

In 2011, the child's father revealed the child was actually a boy, Kong Nyong, and had been taken care of by the UN food aid station. Nyong had died four years prior, c. 2007, of "fevers", according to his family.

The striking part came afterward after the story was published in the "New York Times". The image gathered a lot of criticisms, both positive and negative. People argued that he should have helped the girl in rescuing her and other congratulated him for his excellent shot. But the main story? Lies far ahead.

He waited so Vulture could inch closer

Carter, waited for about 20 minutes so that the Vulture would end up near the poor child and even flap it's wings so that it would be a dramatic shot. However, it did not happen and so Carter photographed the still image, chased the vulture away and ran towards the runaway. He did not help the child in any order and left the scene as it was, a hungry poor miserable child on his face, on his way to the UN feeding center. As Carter described, as the rampant situation, he did not find the situation of the girl particularly unique.

But why?

In Carter’s defense, photojournalists at that time were specifically instructed not to touch famine victims due to the possibility of spreading disease. There was little he could have done to help the girl, but it was easy to judge someone who watched and took photographs while a human being suffered. The revelation that Carter spent 20 minutes on the scene certainly didn't help his reputation. Said the St. Petersburg Times, “The man adjusting his lens to take just the right frame of her suffering, might just as well be a predator, another vulture on the scene.”

Still, not all of the reaction to the photo was negative. Many praised it for how powerfully and emotionally it captured the human suffering that was occurring in South Sudan. No written description of the famine could make so striking a point as this single picture. Kevin Carter was awarded the Pulitzer Prize for the photo in 1994. He took his own life shortly thereafter.[ranker]

More Tragedy afterward

At the age of 33, Carter drove his car to a place where he used to play as a child, hooked a hose up to his exhaust, and committed suicide via carbon monoxide poisoning. He left behind a suicide note that said he was suffering from depression and debt troubles and also mentioned the trauma he was experiencing from a career of photographing horrible situations. He talked in the note of “vivid memories of killings and corpses and anger and pain…of starving or wounded children, of trigger-happy madmen, often police, of killer executioners...”

The photograph and the controversy surrounding it were added stress in a life full spent capturing atrocities on camera. Kevin Carter's memory could not erase the images he'd seen with his own eyes. It all added up, and winning an award for one such haunting image likely only compounded the guilt until Carter decided he'd had enough.[ranker]